Motivation Mondays: SELF-CONTROL
“Self-control is one mark of a mature person; it applies to control of language, physical treatment of others, and the appetites of the body.” Joseph B. Wirthlin

Motivation Mondays: SELF-CONTROL
WATCH – Atomic Habits: How to Get 1% Better Every Day – James Clear
What Is Self-Control? Self-control — or the ability to subdue one’s impulses, emotions, and behaviors in order to achieve longer-term goals—is what separates modern people from their ancient ancestors and the rest of the animal kingdom… The ability to exert self-control is typically called willpower. Willpower is what allows people to direct their attention, and it underlies all kinds of achievement, from school to the workplace. Psychology Today
Self-Control/Self-Care: What is holding you hostage? How do we flip the switch from habits that control us to developing self-control and self-care goals? One of my favorite authors is Seth Godin, and he says that “The best way to change long-term behavior is with short-term feedback.” Quite often, we jump right in with a long list of ways we plan to vanquish the demons around us, but we forget that they weren’t created overnight. Instead of trying to make huge sweeping changes that we would most likely discard in a week or two, it is best to start small. Take tiny steps that are doable; small chunks that are moveable and gradual progress that feels feasible.
Remember the story I shared a few weeks ago about the 2 ants? Well, here it is again for your contemplation below. So many of us have excessive habits/addictions that inhibit our goals and effort. We shop, spend, eat, drink, drive, sleep, to-do, exercise, criticize, demonize, party too much. Then we wonder why things are falling apart around us or why we are not seeing some of the expected results we hold dear. Start small and build strong. Sounds pretty simple right? But it works.
Last Friday, I was driving into NYC to take a dance class, and, at three different spots on the highway, the traffic was snarled almost to a halt. Each time I wondered what the heck was going on as that time of day isn’t usually slowed by cars. Each time, it turned out to be a nasty car accident involving three or more cars. I was flabbergasted and wondered what the universe was trying to tell me. You see, like so many drivers, whenever I’m running late to something, the temptation increases to accelerate and increase my speed with the hope of knocking off the 15 minutes I wasted at home procrastinating. On Friday, I left early because I have been trying to make a concerted effort to deal with my tendency to live on African Time or what some call Black people time. Yes, Luvvie Ajayi, you are not alone. Hahaha. Frankly, jokes aside, it is really time-challenged people time; it’s global not unique to any particular ethnicity.
Anyway, I’ve been taking small but incremental steps to correct the habit and so, on Friday, I was reminded that planning my leave-the-house time properly had benefits. Plus, developing this type of control over time management has additional health and self-care benefits; stress reduction, feelings of calm and clarity, punctuality to appointments and a general sense of well-being. Am I fully there yet? Of course not, isn’t that the point of this post? We learn and grow together. When you own your stuff and acknowledge its impact on your growth, you can begin to make effective, gradual, and permanent changes. Another bit of advice: If you fall down while working on gaining back control over your vices, get right back up, dust off the evidence and start right back in again. Failure is not an option. So, what is holding YOU hostage?
READ: Self-Control
This Is Marketing: You Can’t Be Seen Until You Learn to See by Seth Godin
I’M JUDGING YOU: The Do Better Manual by Luvvie Ajayi
The Ants and the Cookie
One day, two ants went exploring. They came across two giant cookies.
“These cookies are huge!” said the first ant.
“One of these cookies would feed my whole family for a month,” said the second ant. “But,how can little ants like us carry such big cookies like these?”
“It seems impossible!” said the first ant. “But, I must try.”
So, the first ant started to tug and pull at one cookie. Suddenly, a tiny piece broke off.
“I am going to take this piece back to my family,” said the first ant.
“You go ahead,” said the second ant. “I’m not going to waste my time on such a small piece of cookie. I will find a way to take the whole cookie back to my family.”
So, the first ant went home with her small piece of cookie. Soon, the first ant returned. She found the second ant still pushing and shoving the other cookie, but she was unable to move it. Again, the first ant broke off a small piece of cookie and took it back home. This went on for most of the day as some of her family even offered to join her. The first ant kept carrying small pieces of cookie back to her family until she had moved the entire cookie.
The second ant finally grew tired of trying to complete the task that seemed too big to do. She went home with nothing. What is the lesson here?
“Self-reverence, self-knowledge, self-control; these three alone lead life to sovereign power.” Alfred Lord Tennyson

Motivation Mondays: SELF-CONTROL
WATCH – It Takes Only A Few Days To Change Your Habits | James Clear
10 Things This Book Will Teach You- Learn how to…
Build a system for getting 1% better every day.
Break your bad habits and stick to good ones.
Avoid the common mistakes most people make when changing habits.
Overcome a lack of motivation and willpower.
Develop a stronger identity and believe in yourself.
Make time for new habits (even when life gets crazy).
Design your environment to make success easier.
Make tiny, easy changes that deliver big results.
Get back on track when you get off course.
And most importantly, how to put these ideas into practice in real life. Atomic Habits by James Clear
Self Discipline/Habits: Recently, I was led to the seminal book on breaking habits listed here, through my Pastor. Atomic Habits by James Clear walks us through the basic and quite logical steps it takes to shift direction from a debilitating habit to more self awareness and self-control over our lives. As shared above, James promises that his book will teach you ten new ways of getting things done without feeling stressed out about it. Why? Because he recommends the sensible approach of taking four important first steps: 1. Noticing/ Cues – removing them from our surroundings or thinking. 2. Wanting/Cravings – Identifying what attracts and derails us and removing it from our view. 3. Response/Doing – Making the easy and concerted decision to do the opposite thing of what holds us down, in small steps, or adopt the new habit that will empower us. and 4. Reward/ Liking – Seeing and acknowledging the satisfaction that comes from taking on a new way of doing things and seeing the results.
The thrust of James’ argument is that when we remove the do or die approach to change in our lives, our brain re-calibrates and works in concert to support our tiny effort. Then, as we steadily build momentum with each new step, it feels good instead of feeling forced like those crazy diets that don’t work. Give it a try, watch the videos above, and/or read James book and see how you can begin to take small steps that will help you gain self-control over your choices.
How did this topic of Self-Control come my way? You see, we have been doing a three week clean, natural, earth foods, no sugar, no caffeine, no meats fast at my church, and it’s called the Daniel Fast. Frankly, even though I don’t eat meat and already eat healthy veggies, fruits and grains, and wasn’t worried about that part of it, I was concerned about my sugar and coffee intake. Okay? I mean, I developed the habit over many years and sold myself on the warped belief that my brain doesn’t function until I have my sweetened coffee. But, as James Clear aptly says in his writings, “We don’t rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the level of our systems.” I knew that in order to let this notion of a daily sugar/caffeine do or die habit go, I had to take small steps by making choices that felt better.
I have replaced the coffee with veggie broth and the sugar with sweet fruits. I’ve gotten busy by increasing my exercise and walking routine, and adding a new dance class to the mix.
Instead of wasting time lamenting all the things I’m unable to have, I’ve redirected my energy by adding things I enjoy to the mix, and shifting direction to the rewards of healthier eating and dancing. Go figure. It’s working and I would be the first to tell you if it didn’t; I wasn’t sure I’d make it past Day 1 either but, I took the tools before me to heart and focused on daily successes instead of jumping ahead to claim future gains. By staying grounded in the present and completing each daily goal, I’ve come to enjoy my progress. Give it a try and let me know how you are facing your demons and slaying them. Again that last bit of advice is in order: If you fall down while working on gaining back control over your vices, get right back up, dust off the evidence and start right back in again. Failure is not an option. So, what is holding YOU hostage?
READ: Atomic Habits by James Clear
The details for Motivation Mondays are below. Join in! The themes for DEC 2018/JAN 2019 are:
12/02 – 01 World AIDS Day, 02 Advent begins, Hanukkah starts, International abolition of slavery, 07 Pearl Harbor
12/09 – 10 Human Rights Day, Hanukkah ends, green Monday,
12/16 – 18 International Migrants Day, 21 Winter Solstice, 22 Super Saturday
12/23 – 23 4th Sunday of Advent, 25 Christmas Day, 26 Kwanzaa starts, Boxing Day, 27 St John’s feast
12/30 – 31 New Year’s eve
01/01 – 01 New Year’s Day, 05 National Bird Day
01/06 – 06 Golden Globe Awards, 07 Orthodox Christmas, 11 Human Trafficking Awareness Day,
01/13 – 13 Critics Choice Awards, 14 Image Awards, 16 Religious Freedom Day
01/20 – 21 Martin Luther King Jr. Day, 26 Nat’l. Spouses Day
01/27 – 27 Commemoration Victims of the Holocaust, SAG Awards
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“Personal health is related to self-control and to the worship of life in all its natural beauty – self-control bringing with it happiness, renewed youth, and long life.” Maria Montessori

Motivation Mondays: SELF-CONTROL
Start the practice of self-control with some penance; begin with fasting. Mahavira
By constant self-discipline and self-control you can develop greatness of character. Grenville Kleiser
Industry, thrift and self-control are not sought because they create wealth, but because they create character. Calvin Coolidge
I have learned that I really do have discipline, self-control, and patience. But they were given to me as a seed, and it’s up to me to choose to develop them. Joyce Meyer
Which area of your life would you like to gain more control over or change? If you could change some aspect of your life to gain more control, would you? Assuming we are in control of everything in our lives, it is important that we learn to surrender our need to control every single outcome and be open to the wisdom of the universe. Try taking small incremental steps to change and let go of the big results. Cherish the small ones as they send messages to our brain to keep going. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t focus on our plans and goals, we should. However, we must learn the difference between working towards a goal and doing every dubious deed to get there. Give yourself a break when you fail, but get right back up and do a small effort act. Don’t buy the sugary treats. Put your sneakers by the door as a reminder to move more. Sign up for that movement class and then Go!
A few years ago, a brilliant doctor told me that if we pick one day a week as our indulge day, we won’t miss the habits we are trying to curtail as much. If you can’t fully let go of whatever holds you back, give it one day a week and gradually wean yourself of it entirely.
When we stay open to the possibilities in life, and learn to work smart not so hard while remaining expectant, our lives will become richer for it. Each day will bring new and better opportunities for growth. They might not be exactly what we had hoped for, but they will be richer. Whenever we hesitate to take action in a certain direction to further our success, we must ask ourselves the question: What is interfering with my decision to act? Listen for the answer in a sincere manner and learn from it. Sometimes, it might be self sabotage or a need to control outcomes in a grand and sweeping way or just FEAR.
Sometimes, it might be the wisdom of the universe teaching us to pause because, for every important action, there is a right time and season. The cards are in YOUR hands, play them with self care in mind and a reflective heart.
Any Zen Antics stories via
Positive Motivation Tip: Self control leads to self care and ultimately satisfaction and well being. Don’t give up.
Motivation Mondays is open to anyone who wishes to share a motivational quote, photo, personal challenge or a post that encourages others to start the week on an upbeat note.
Basic Instructions: Each week, I will have a motivation word to help us create a response. (See listed words for the months above/below)
Email address: You may email or share your post as a comment and I will add it to the round-up of related posts. email it to: contact(@)mirthandmotivation(.)com
Category tag: – Share your post using Motivation Mondays
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Dedicated Page: There is a dedicated page for Motivation Mondays. It has the same instructions and will include other helpful tools and a link to the round-up
Facebook Page: MotivationOnMondays Join our page and add your post and/or any motivational piece you think will be helpful to others.
Facebook Community: We have a Facebook community forum to compliment the page. It serves as another way to share uplifting posts and thoughts. Please join in and add your voice.
Badge: – I created a fun badge using PicMonkey’s free photo editing tools. You can create your own, use WordPress’ integrated tool on your blog or you are welcome to use mine. (see dedicated page)
Tag: – Motivation Mondays
Hashtag: – #MotvnM
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PHOTO CREDITS/ATTRIBUTIONS: All Photos: Self-Control, Habits, via Pixabay, AND/OR via Wikipedia…
Until Next Time…
Ask. Believe. Receive. ©
Elizabeth Obih-Frank
Mirth and Motivation
Positive Kismet
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Over the last seven months, I have taken control of my health. I have lost 50lbs and am feeling so much better.
Congratulations! 🙂
When it comes to myself I have a lot of self control (apart from chocolate – I struggle!) but I also hold myself back by controlling myself when I should let loose a little more!
Another great motivation Monday. I have really upped my self control this month and feel so much better for it!
Oh How I love the story of that two ants and the lesson it taught us. Small easy steps to your goal is better than being stubborn and want instant success right away.
My self control never used to be great, but as I have grown older I have managed to be able to use self control which also gives me a huge boost x
Self control is such an important value to cultivate. I want to cultivate self control in my finances because I really need to find a way of tracking my finances.
I quit cold turkey a decade ago, and never looked back. It was an easy decision for me to make at that time since I found out that I was already five weeks pregnant. 🙂
Digging these motivational Monday posts. Full of great stuff!
Thanks for sharing this! Great article!
Self control is also something I need to work on! Especially when it comes to chocolate 😉
It is sometimes hard to express self control. But it is necessary to do.
Nice thoughts. Work smarter not harder is a great mindset to have!
Interesting post as ever, I certainly need to learn a little more self controlling when it comes to eating bad things!
What an uplifting and inspirational post
I totally agree that it is important that we learn to surrender our need to control every single outcome and be open to the wisdom of the universe. Thanks for sharing these great tips.
I am a hostage of chocolate and coffee for many years, but honestly is not that bad. I try to eat really balanced and honestly I need coffee because I get huge headaches if I don’t have at least a cup a day.
All things in moderation isn’t bad.
For me, attaining self control is one of the greatest achievements in life. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Self control from your point is very unusual. great angle. I loved the story about ants, I see it way too often so the second ant has familiar faces to me. I’d say even more: being the second ant is a motto of the nation I live with.
Ok, I really needed to read this. I have been “trying” to cut out sugar all month, but it tends to creep in on me and I feel like I need it. I realize I haven’t really been trying and need to find ways to redirect the cravings rather than give in.
That sometimes you need to be practical. When th e goal is just too hard. Let it go and just do just what you can.
Always in need of a motivation monday! Thank you for this post, and sharing your insight.
I think I’m quite good at self control. I need to work harder on controlling my emotions, now that’s more difficult!
It was a great story, sometimes we shouldn’t just waste our time and effort on things we obviously cannot do.
Being high in controlling our desires and impulses is important in achieving the goals we set for ourselves. … Being able to manage and regulate needs, desires and emotions are thus vital to performing well academically and sticking to school tasks.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this, there were so many sage pointers. I’ve used CBT to help control my negative thought cycles and found it liberating. I could really relate when you wrote “if you fall down while working on gaining back control over your vices, get right back up, dust off the evidence and start right back again”. Sometimes, it’s this tiny decision to accept the misstep and learn from it that is the game changer in the long-term.
Very true… don’t give in or give up.
I’ve always prided myself on my self control. I think strong will and self control mixed with being a good person and a hard worker will always end in success.
Yes, you are right. This is very helpful. It’s really hard to avoid such a habit like procrastinating but by doing something little every day might get a job done. I have a thesis that is due tomorrow and I’m cramming tonight. I don’t even know why i got the time read this but thanks anyway
best wishes on your paper…
Really eye-opening post. Makes me want to do better by being present and listing to my inner voice of calm in this crazy world. Thank you for sharing :).
New year, new habits, we all know the drill. So this month I started implementing quite a few new habits and although I haven`t listen properly, so many people recommended to start with 2 maximum 3 new habits but do I even listen. So I start again, it`s not a failure just a lesson for self control and taking things slowly.
If there was a way to change or control something in my life, it would be my health. I know I am the unwilling recipient of gene markers for certain illnesses, but I could have done something in my youth to prevent it from being a full blown diseases in my adult life.
I hear you and you are making the best of it.
Self control, self-discipline, and self-care are three things that very few people have mastered. If they did master these things it would make the world so much better and it will relieve people of a lot of pain and suffering that they do to their own selves
Yep. we are all a work in progress…
I’m a big advocate of self-care! Thanks for sharing.
I love the Ant and the Cookie story. I am going to share this with my students tomorrow!
Lately I’ve been feeling like my time is not my own. I say yes to others and don’t say yes to myself. I need to control the impulse to always say yes to others even when it’s at a detriment to myself.
Self control is so important for our us. Its important that we utilitze our power to control what we can but to also understand that somethings are beyond our control.
I love your advice about taking incremental steps and letting go of big results…I need to do that. Thanks for such an motivational post.
I struggle with self control, especially when it comes to food. Thanks for sharing this!
Oooh! This topic is on point. I am awesome with certain self-control aspects, but with sugar or caffeine, i’m terrible!
I feel like it really takes unlearning negative habits and teaching yourself new, positive habits to really master self-control
You’re totally right! I definitely tend to bite off more than I can chew and end up giving up, rather than taking small steps toward a goal!
When you asked: Which area of your life would you like to gain more control over or change?
I think the answer for me is accepting that there is not a lot of control or change in most circumstances. It’s the hardest thing for me to let go of.
Self-control is really important. But sometimes we need to let it go because sometimes the more we take control the more unexpected things happen that you don’t have any control.
Love the story about the ant and the cookie! Self-control is so important even though it can be quite hard sometimes…
I think having self control is so important. The quote about changing long term behaviour with short term feedback is a really interesting one, I do think we have to make lots of small changes to make one larger change x
Interesting article. Have to remember the ant story it represents so much!
Nice. This article is perfect in this world where everything is almost instantaneous. I’ll share this one.
What a great tips! I will definitely be sharing this information with my parents! Keep it up
I feel that I have a good amount of self control. I am a very disiplined person and seem to be able to stick to plans and rules well.
This was so informative I felt like I was reading a short book. I can’t quite believe you’ve written a 1000 posts but I agree that caffeine (coca cola) and sugar holds me hostage.
Thankfully, I have quit cold turkey almost a decade ago, and I never looked back.
I’m always waiting a post from this amazing blog site where we get motivated. This topic of self control is really a great stuff to learn and practice in our daily lives to help us to be a good person wherever we are and any given time of the day.
We all need to experience self control at times, sometimes it is much harder than other times x
I definitely have issues with self control in certain aspects of my life. I will take your advice and get back to working on it! Thanks!
That’s a amazing post on self control. I agree with you self control is very important. Love reading your post.
This was an incredible read!!! Thank you for sharing!
“We fall to the level of our systems.” Wow! What a profound thought – had never thought of it that way before, but you are totally right! Am working to teach my kids aspects of self-control along the lines of what you describe here, so thanks for the inspiring read!
Self-control is so, so important and I really think it goes a long way in showing maturity. Great, insightful post!
That’s awesome. The guide has many things which are really awesome for many peoples. Many things are mentioned which are useful.
That’s awesome. The guide has many things which are really awesome for many peoples. Many things are mentioned which are useful. Pics are making me carry.
We should really have thid ability because sometimes like can be tough. You have amazing tips, thank you for sharing!
Self-control is something that I struggled with. But now that I have learned to take a step back and bless and release negativity, and look at the whole situation
Self control is such an important skill, and influences our lives in so many ways through our ability to cultivate healthy habits. Thanks for the info on improving this skill.
Self control is indeed so very important but it’s so hard to achieve. Thanks for sharing these useful tips I’m sure they’ll help many of us!
I love this one about self-control. Something that is really important to everyone.
The Daniel fast sounds difficult but worth it. It’s definitely something that I would like to try one day. Self control is an on-going battle. You can always find ways to improve and areas of your life where you need it more.
This is a perfect time for me to read about self control and self care. For me, self control is a HUGE part of self care. If I can’t control my urges to eat any of the MANY foods my body hates I can get pretty sick and have even ended up in the ER a few times (though I didn’t know the culprit at the time). If I don’t control my desire to prove myself, to do more, to be more, I can get pretty sick from overwork rather easily. I’m finally at a place in my life where I know WHAT I need to control to stay healthy and safe and am excited that I have the power to make such huge changes in my own life.
Good for you. Bravo!
Self control is important, I will probably do some stuff on impulse, but I am glad that I have enough self control that when let’s say I need to save money for something (like gifts, or a trip or that really really good hot chocolate that this one place near me has) that I can do it, I simply say to myself before any decision do you want to do that or do you need to do that, or buy that, or get that, sure it wasn’t a simple process, but if you are determined then you can accomplish anything.
With a big family I know I have to have self control when it comes to every aspect in my life. For me it is my attitude and finances that require the most self control for me. This was a good reminder how much we need to have self control. It is a very good quality to have!
Got to love a motivational monday! I have been focusing on my self control this January! Thanks for sharing
I am a complete nut for self control! I loved your section on habits, but was intrigued that you included self care as well. That’s definitely less intuitive, but is food for thought.
Self control is so important with all aspects of life. I try to tell my self not to stress about the things I can’t control but make sure I always have self control.
Same here, and I avoid all things that will give me too much stress and no benefits at all. Time is too short for those factors.
The ant and cookie story is a perfect example of how we can get bogged down with what seems like an overwhelming task. Thank you for that!
I have really heard some amazing things about the Daniel Fast. Since it is biblical and I believe the Word to be true, then I think this may be what I need to do this year. My downfall—- caffeine! Any advice you guys?
It is working for me. I love it.
Self control is definitely one of the most difficult things to have! I need to work on this more in my own life.
Well for me, i want to have a more self control on giving too much, when it comes to love.
hahah I had no idea “Black People time” was a thing! Brown people have a thing too called “Desi Standard Time” and its always 2 hours late lol. I like your output on slowing down and not rushing. Giving yourself enough time is definitely helpful to not feel rushed!
I love yours. Hahaha! Desi Standard Time.Brilliant
I always like to take my time to read your insightful and inspiring post. This one was absolutely great as expected.
Self control is quite hard to maintain but will definitely make your life a lot better.
I live the part where you explain how shifting your energy towards things that elevate your mood or that are best for you. We have the power to change the way we see things
I visit your blog almost every other day and get super motivated reading your post. With stressful life being self-control is something that helps. Thanks for writing such motivational post and making my week super fun. You rock girl!
You rock too!:)
This is such a great post to ponder. I just love the topic and how it can help us and inspire us to have self-control in every situation of our life.
This is something that I really need. My life now is a chaos. Self-control is something that I need to learned.
Self control is important in everyone’s lives, thank you for the reminder.
What a powerful message this week. I don’t know what is holding me back. I do practice self-care except if it is with my favorite chai drink from Starbucks. I don’t buy everyday but I buy a lot and I can’t make it at home as well.
Self-control is a good quality to learn and understand. Great message.
Self control is something we all need to work on no matter the age! I really enjoy your Motivation Mondays.
I look forward to your weekly post! Self control is my 2019 theme!!!! Thank you so much for yet another awesome post.
Chad
Wow…this is remarkable. I enjoyed reading through the self control guidelines as reflected from your mirror…Quite educational!
Honestly, I use to be a heavy procrastinator and I forced myself be more mindful of time and take small actions that would help my overall daily tasks be completed in a more efficient manner. Great suggestions for ways to stay motivated daily!
You are really good at addressing really important issues in today’s world. This post just reminds me of the terrible incident that happened to Jussie Smollet. What is wrong with the world? Why are people so racist and angry? where has self control gone?
It is the hatred that clouds their thinking… a really sad event.yes. 🙁
I think we can all do with a little more self control in some part of our lives! Maybe mine is eating less chocolate and working out more!
I also had to reduce my sugar intake and it’s kinda hard, really hard. I hope certain blogs about self control can help me.
Self – control is something that sometimes really hard to do but when you try and try practicing it you will gain knowledge and reverence.
I generally have pretty good self-control and discipline. If it involves something that makes me feel deprived, I always allow myself some bit of “cheating”.
I have a mysterious relationship with control. I use little things like decor and meals to control the heck out of knowing that the big things are often out of my hands.
It is a very important point, that you made. Self control is really very important in each and every situation.
Completely agree! Self control is so important and can save your butt from any situation!Great Post!
Self control is important, and a lot of us probably wanted to have more self control in one aspect of our lives or another, and probably a lot would like to change some things, but what if you don’t need to change, those actions defined you, it showed you that sometimes it’s good to have self control, it made you learn for the future, it took me along time but I managed to get my self control up to a high degree, and yet I still manage to fall in to temptation from time to time.
We all fall short. To err is human and to forgive ourselves and others is divine.
Self control and discipline is really important in one’s life.. thanks for sharing some Great tips
Last May I began a new lifestyle of eating. It took (and still takes) a lot of self control, but the end result is so worth it!!
Thank you for reminding me about self control. This is really a big help! More to share!
My husband always jokes with me, because I have really good self control. Him on the other hand, does not have have good self control.
I am pretty good with self control, unless it’s that time of the month – to be honest. I will have to share this inspiration with others!
This is so important! I also struggle with my patience in traffic. Constantly working on it though.
This topic just cut right through me. I am impulsive, and sometimes I react first before I think (which is not good most of the time). I have made mistakes because I couldn’t control myself, my language, my emotions, and my actions. I have hurt people dear to me. So this is something I am working on. So that I can achieve that level of maturity, and have willpower.
You are not alone Sis, thanks for your honest feedback.
Decisions are sometimes hard to put to work but self control helps. Those books are worth checking. Keep motivating!
Great post as usual, it took me a long time to master self control. Now, I can say that I don’t rush to say or do anything.
Such great questions. I am not sure what areas in my life that I would change. I would probably want to improve procrastination.
Inspirational as always 🙂 This really is the ultimate personal challenge isn’t it? Love the use of the fable as well. Thanks for sharing!
A great quote to start this blog ” it applies to control of language, physical treatment of others, and the appetites of the body”. You very rightly pointed habits aren’t acquired overnight and it takes time to change them. I would like to share something here, I practice this myself and this has helped me. To conquer something I break it into small parts and practice the first phase for a week or so until it gets naturally and then keep on adding until the destination is reached. And in this process a lot of time temptations cross the path but self control is what leads to final destination.
Sometimes it is hard to learn self-control especially when you are in the heights of great happiness or satisfaction. However as I mature, I learn to have self-control because I realized having it gives me more advance, sane life, and of course safe and secure.
Self-control is really necessary to achieve our goals! This is an everyday battle! Hahaha!
Self control is something I am still working on. I want to be able to stay calm and patient for the longest time possible when faced with an unpleasant situation.
Very true.. self care and discipline is very important in life! Thanks for motivating us and sharing some great tips. 👍🏻
Isn’t it interesting how sometimes the universe decides to teach us things at just the right time? I’ve had a few of those moments as well and I am always so grateful that I got the lesson and didn’t need to be thought a tougher one.
Some really interesting points here. Really like your thought about your journey to NYC, why is it that when we get stuck in traffic we tend to stress and accelerate – ironic when you think about it. Self Control is a really important lesson to learn, something i often struggle with. Thanks for the thoughts and motivation!
Self discipline is very important in life. I enjoyed reading your post as usual.
I totally agree with your quote, self control does mark maturity (no matter what age you are), and something we all need to learn and use
I agree that self control is a way of loving oneself. When faced with temptations, being able to turn away is exercising self control. When we know what may cause ourselves harm and stay away from it means we are not only staying safe for our selves but also for the ones who care for us.
Beautifully written post! I have been learning and practicing more self control since I’ve started my meditation journey. Self control is a powerful tool.
Self Control is necessary but hard to do sometimes!
All very good points here. I really like the story of the ant in the cookie. So many times, small things done consistently make the most difference. Great post!
I love this. Those little ants explain what you mean so well. I live with chronic pain, and I often talk about the importance of the small things in life and of being proud of small achievements. If I try to do too much, I would fail miserably – just like your ant!
“We don’t rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the level of our systems.” This is exactly what I needed to hear, today. Correction, EVERY DAY! I fall to my habits more often than I’d like to admit.
I like the way you give real life example to teach some great thoughts. Yes self control is very important. & how can I forget your ant story! Great post.
James Clear aptly says in his writings, “We don’t rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the level of our systems.” That quote is AWESOME! it’s very true (I’m going to write that down) As for self-control, that is one thing I think I am very good at, everyone in my family pokes fun at me because I have such self control.
love the topic!
love that story of the ants and the cookies, i think i have been that second ant a few times… 🙂 i am now learning to be the first ant at all times.. but sometimes i forget..
I am sure my sister will also love this awesome book. Such a great reminder for self control and life balance.
Taking small steps is really the best way to achieve long term goals, i am working on it too!
Exactly! I have learnt the hard to let go of things that are not in my control.
Self control and self discipline can be tough! Whether it is a new diet or changing our habits, these are things we have to work on. These are great Monday thoughts that you share.
Such a good article. I love that Seth Godin quote and try to live by it. Short term feedback is essential for long term success 🙂 Thanks for sharing!
I love your posts. Self control is such an important component to any success.
My self control and discipline falls flat whenever I see or smell a cake or chocolate. Reducing my sugar or sweets intake is something I’m working towards. I have been using James Clear strategies outlined in his book as a guide. So far, I think I’m doing great.
Thank you for this thoughts
That was an interesting story of the ants. It teaches us some very important lessons. Loved your post on Self control
this is full of great information! I love the story of the two ants. I hadn’t heard that story before. So true!
I swear, sometimes it’s like you live inside my brain. Self control and self discipline are things I have been working on lately.
I have self control with the majority of things in my life. Although food is hard to control myself with. Great motivational Monday!
Self control is such a hardest thing for me. I need to control myself from using social media more and eating fast foods and also my financing. Thanks for the great motivation.
I think self control is the hardest virtue to master. I’m a teacher but I fail on this many times.
It is very hard at first to learn self control and to be discipline to achieve your goals in life. This is really inspiring so thank you so much!
I have to learn a bit about self control when it comes to my eating habits. I tend to overdo it lately and it’s not good.
I would like to gain more control over my anxiety! I can feel really worried about silly things that most wouldn’t bat an eyelid over.
yes, self control is something that i am good at! this is very interesting topic
Wow this tips made my day. keep it up.
Self-control is one of my New Year’s resolutions
I totally agree! small sacrifices or self control will always lead you to greatness! I myself, has been following timeline and goals and it works for me
Interesting article. Really have to read more of it. Thank you so much for sharing!
great story, sometimes self control is really hard and we should just le go of things e really can’t do, acceptance will make it all easier
I love the quotes you included! Self control and self discipline is important, but equally important is self love!
Great piece of advice!
I manage a startup & an independent Hedge Fund so I very well know the importance of self discipline & time management.
self control can be tough but you can improve by practicing little by little
I love your motivation articles – so thorough!
My self control over the last year was managing my money. I saved my exact money goal for 2018.
I am really working on self-control lately, as I also feel that need to accelerate when traffic is terrible, lol. Thank you for another wonderful article!
It’s been a little over a month since I started tracking my calorie intake and watching what I eat. Im seeing progress already! Thanks to self control
self control is realy hard sometimes, and what youve shared is really inerestng, I had fun reading it
Its always a good thing to be self controlled. It help to curb some bad occurrence and makes one to earn more respect
I’m still learning the art of self-control! Sometimes it is too difficult to let things go that are not in our control!
Such a greay article to read! Self-control is the ability to control the expression of our passions and emotions.
I am pretty good with self control unless it’s about food and sweet things. It’s so hard to control myself. Currently working on cutting out the sweets. i
Self control is so important to your overall health. Indulging in too much is never a healthy thing. Great post!
Self control is so important, but sometimes so hard to master! I struggle in the area of emotions. I spend so much time worrying about things that I can not take back, when there would be much better ways to use my energy.
This is an awesome article! I need to work on my own self control!
GREAT post ! I have taken self control when it comes to food! I have lost 15kg temptation is easy self control is the real work
Getting 1% better every day, I love that!!! It’s like taking baby steps that will lead to bolder and greater ones. Thanks for sharing as always.
When it comes about my emotion and feelings I have self control to handle things even in my part is very hard, Long patience and self discipline is very important.
Having self-control is power! When you accidentally lose it in a very important moment (especially in business) you will get tremendous lost, and hard to gain it back.
Hands down the best thing I have read today. Something to learn.. self control is essential
As always in your posts, there is some great food for thought here. Exercising self control has always been easier said than done, but as was pointed out in the beginning, it is a quality that separates us from animals as we have learned and progressed as a species. I think the key to overall success when it comes to self-control is to have a big enough ‘why’ (reason). Provided that you truly believe the ‘why’ is far more important than your initial instinct or desire, self control should win through (at least that’s the theory). But we all have to decide that for ourselves.
YES, WE HAVE TO DECIDE WHAT OUR WHY IS WORTH TO US…
Great post! Self control is so important… yet something I think a lot of us struggle with – it’s tough sometimes!
From my own perspective, self control is a vital incentive to develop, a lot of everything isn’t great. Thanks for sharing these extraordinary tips.
I really enjoyed reading this post. I am someone who struggles with will power and self control. I could really identify with several of the points in this post and enjoyed the suggestion of taking one day for indulging while eventually weening yourself off the craving/habit.
Great post!
This is a great topic to discuss. Self control is an area we all have difficulty with and one I’m working through as well (with unhealthy food).
I have always been in control of my life. Hasn’t always been easy or fun but that is part of life. I don’t like big cities and their traffic and concrete everywhere.
This post hits the head on the nail for me this week. I’ve been dealing with my weight since having my last baby 2 years ago. And reigning in how much I eat or convincing myself to exercise has been a huge flop. It came to a head when I went for a check up and heard I was now 190 lbs. 50 lbs over my ideal weight for my height. Your post is ever so helpful and gives me the encouragement I need to push myself back on track! Thank you!
KEEP UP THE POSITIVE APPROACH
Love it!!!! I feel you have to be in control of all things I. Your life if you want to be successful.
I agree that it’s best to break down long-term goals into short-term tasks. I love the ant analogy!
We live in a society that needs constant reassurance and quick gratification. As one who procrastinates more than I should, this really hits home and is EXACTLY what I need this Monday morning.
I run into the same problem! I am always running behind and I have to admit…sometimes I feel as if I should drive a little faster to make it to my destination on time. It’s good to sit back and realize that being on time isn’t always worth risking an accident.
Some great tips and advice here – I really should take this on board for 2019! Here’s to a better, happier, healthier and more prosperous year 🙂 x
Self control is something I really need to work on! I hadn’t even thought of speeding when I am late but you are so right. That is about self control as well. I feel like I need to make a list now, haha!
Having the willpower to focus on the necessary things in my everyday life is what allows me to feel more in control. I think discipline plays a huge role in all this.
This is really something that I could do better with, so thanks for broaching this topic. It’s helpful for me to read this, and think about how I can improve in that manner!
I have really been trying to work on my self control. Somedays are better then others in that regard but I will still keep trying!
I agree with self control being important. It is important not to take any decision when you are angry and give it time let the situation cool down before making a radical decision.
I started this month, a self control and self love, by loosing weight and controling myself from being hype buying. 🙂 Thanks for sharing
At times self control can be tough. That said it is always better to take the higher road and you feel great after too xx
Self control is something I start off with and then do start to lose somewhere along the line, but on other things I can control really well
Starting small to fix changes in our lives are always very helpful. The positive results are always there even when we don’t see it.
I lack self control when it comes to desserts and shopping. I am trying to work towards it. Loved your inspiring post
I wish I could have self-control on myself. I am doing great when it comes how I behave to other people but I need to work more for myself.
Self control is so very important really. It makes or breaks days sometimes. I need to remember it more often really. I know in the car it can be really hard.
My friends sometimes telling me what a killjoy I am because of my self-control. But I just brushed it off. I stand my ground if necessary and exercise self control, than be sorry.
Another Great Motivational article, thanks for sharing
Self-control is a virtue, one I wish I was able to practice in all things! I’ve gotten quote good over the years, but there’s always room for improvement.
I really Need to work on this. It’s a constant impulse. I have Goals this year that i would like to complete.
Your post always contain so much wisdom. For instance,“Self-reverence, self-knowledge, self-control; these three alone lead life to sovereign power.” Alfred Lord Tennyson these words are definitely just as true today as they wore back when Lord Tennyson was alive.
Thank you. they resonated with me too. 🙂
That is a really good analogy. I can definitely use some help controlling my anxiety. This is something I need to work on in my life.
Self control is the first step on the road to self mastery. Habits can break if you build healthy ones above it instead of hoping it’ll go away.
Yes very good reminders. If you do not have self control you can find yourself in unpleasant situations
I found this post so hopeful and encouraging – if we just have self control and deny the things that are bad for us, we open ourselves to such a better and more fulfilling life!
You can change habits by taking small steps. I did an experiment last year and it worked out so well, it changed some of my bad eating habits and made me feel so much healthier. It takes about 3 weeks to completely change a bad habit and take back control.
Being both ADHD and bi-polar means that I have little self control when it comes to my words and actions. Thankfully, I am on a great combination of meds that help a lot.
Self-control is a pretty powerful tool. I believe over the years, I learned to eliminate everything that doesn’t benefit either my life or body. For instance, I was told by my dentist to stop eating sweets, and I stopped. Thank you for sharing!
Self control is so important in every aspect of your life. I know it’s definitely something I need to work on a bit more. Thanks for sharing!
This is a post a much needed to read! It is very important indeed. Do you have any posts on overthinking? I actually struggle with that a lot.
Self-control is one hard gift but I’m trying. Reading this post assures me that it’s possible. Thanks for the motivation, always.
This is one of the things I have been really struggling on. I should be trying to lose weight but it is just so hard to control my cravings. I end up cheating or just giving up on the whole diet thing. How I wish I can be more brave and focused.
I believe self control is a measure of maturity. Whether we are trying to get our financial house in order or achieve a health goal-it’s all about being able to delay gratification. Great post!
I have found that there are parts of my life where I’m too controlling and parts where I need to have more self control. It all depends on a situations circumstances or my level of self discipline. Great post. Thanks for sharing!
I enjoyed reading it. It’s so tough when it comes to self control, and when these are our long term habits. The story you shared was inspiring. I read book on habits by Sean cowey it was good.
Another learnings for today. Self-control is pretty hard especially you have been indulging yourself from an addiction or vices. Points are very clear and helpful. Thank you
I always love the little inspiring stories you add. Currently I am struggling with taking control over my health issues .
I can sometimes have plenty of self-control and a strong mind set on my goals. But also sometimes, I just give up and forget the goals. It all depends on the mood I am in and the events of the day. I wish I had more control in the bad days.
Self control is something I am working on. This post has been very inspirational and I wrote down some of the quotes that inspired me. Thank you for sharing!
Self control is something I am working on as I get older. I love the story with the ant too, so inspiring!
I think we should first decide what are our goals, are they the right ones. And according to them we should procced with self-control.
self-control is important in our day-to-day life. Thanks for the reminder and inspiration
Self-control is important for maintaining healthy behaviors. What we eat for breakfast, how often we exercise, and whether we have a consistent sleep schedule are all decisions that can be impacted by your levels of self-control. Thanks for the motivation
Starting small when we make changes is important. It means we are more likely to succeed.
Self-discipline is very important. Thanks for sharing motivation.
Thank you for this valuable reminder. There comes a time that we forgot self-control, and sometimes we do impulse decision that we often regret. Nothing wrong with self-control. In fact self-control saves us to make further mistakes.
We need self-control. It gives us the power to dictate our own future. It also gives us peace of mind.
very interesting and unusual topic to read about these days. Self control is a huge part of our lives and it’s an art to know when loosen and when to tighten it up.
I always believe in breaking down long term goals! That’s the best way!
Time management is super important for me. I hate being late so I really do try allow for as much as I can – it definitely helps my anxiety.
This is such an uplifting and inspiring post as usual. It takes a mature person with a lot of emotional intelligence to master self-control.
That was a short and beautiful story about the ants. I think the lesson there is that we shouldn’t overwhelm ourselves with big dreams. Instead, we take baby steps to make it happen. 🙂
I am currently working on self control and so far so good.
This is interesting, we eed to determine which part of our life needs to be changed. Very inspiring!