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Reflections: Letting Go Of Anger & Following Our Bliss…

16/08/2011
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“Live with integrity, respect the rights of other people, and follow your own bliss.” Nathaniel Branden

Reflections: Letting Go Of Anger & Following Our Bliss...

Anger can be used in both a productive and disruptive way, but we must be clear about the difference. When we stand up against oppression and vote our conscience, or speak out against injustice and put our money where our heart knows it will do the best work against evil, our anger is well served.  Allowing others to invade our space and disrupt our bliss over petty squabbles or inaccurate information is a waste of time. Any time we find ourselves getting furious over the actions of or perceived insults from others, it would help to stop and consider, for a moment, that the slight might not be about us…

“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” Buddha

Reflections: Letting Go Of Anger & Following Our Bliss...

Recently, on a trip upstate, I stopped at a rest stop to buy gas and a cup of coffee.  As I was walking towards the double glass doors of the rest stop store, a woman approached quickly on my right side. I reached for the door handle and opened the door. Before I could make a move, the woman pushed right past me, and barreled her way into the store. She didn’t say a word; no sorry, no thank you, nada. I wanted to say something but decided to focus on getting my coffee and moving on. Yes, I was in a good mood and had no desire to start an argument. Plus, when I thought about it, I felt she was oblivious to her surroundings and in a hurry. It wasn’t about me…  I’d say follow your bliss and refocus. I saw her again…  Continued below… 🙂

“Only a man who has felt ultimate despair is capable of feeling ultimate bliss.” Alexandre Dumas Père

Reflections: Letting Go Of Anger & Following Our Bliss...

Lo and behold, as I stood on line to pay for my coffee, there she was again with some snacks in her hand. She paid for her snacks, ignored the store clerk’s friendly “How are you?” and “Thank you!” and… you got it, barreled her way out the door as an elderly man was ambling his way out the same door. She ignored his protests and comment about rude/inconsiderate people and headed off to her car.  She acted in an angry way but we didn’t have to join her there… Follow your bliss.

“For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Reflections: Letting Go Of Anger & Following Our Bliss...

Sure, anger is a human emotion and, from time to time, we all experience it. However, it helps to stop and look at why we are angry; especially when we have sudden outbursts at small, seemingly insignificant things. The underlying cause of our anger is probably something else that is begging to be addressed.  So, address it, as soon as possible and move on. Don’t let your anger stifle other areas of your life. As Seth Godin suggests in a recent post, anger and creativity don’t mesh as anger strangles our creativity; an important thought to ponder.

Sometimes, people say they hold onto anger because they are afraid to discuss it with the other person. It requires a bit of diplomacy to broach difficult subjects, vis a vis the original cause of our anger, but we owe it to ourselves and our peace of mind to do so… we will feel better for it and it will help us to truly follow our bliss.  What are your thoughts? What do you do to overcome your anger? How do you connect with your bliss? Do share! Thank you. 😉

This post was inspired by a prompt from WP Daily Post: Can anger be constructive?

Positive Motivation Tip: Life is short, let anger dissipate and embrace your bliss…

PHOTO CREDITS/ATTRIBUTIONS: All Photos of day lilies via my personal collection. angry penguin and blissful mountains via Wikipedia

Until Next Time…
Ask. Believe. Receive. ©
Elizabeth Obih-Frank
Mirth and Motivation
Positive Kismet

16 Comments leave one →
  1. 17/08/2011 12:07 am

    I think it is important to choose my battles. As I grow and become aware of what my needs are and what the universe needs from me at a particular time, my responses change.

  2. 17/08/2011 1:28 am

    Great advise on recognizing anger, finding the source and dealing with them rationale.

  3. 17/08/2011 2:46 am

    I am fortunate because I never stay angry for long. I don’t like how it makes me feel and I can usually see the other side of an argument (not always!).

    You have to pity those who live in their anger; what a miserable life it must be.

  4. 17/08/2011 7:01 am

    Learning to let things slide is a life-long education.

  5. 17/08/2011 9:03 am

    I’m living with anger every day during this trial I’m in. It’s very stressful but for fighting injustice, it is necessary. Your post helps me to have perspective for the rest of my day when the anger starts to creep in where it doesn’t belong. Thanks Elizabeth!! Miss you but trying to stop in when I can.

  6. 17/08/2011 9:47 am

    You hit a nerve today my friend. I have been looking for the right time to address some issues that need to be aired and then move on. I’m more inclined to blow when I’m angry and then I’m over it. It’s harder to do that when you’re dealing with someone (who shall remain nameless) that holds it all inside and never honestly discusses the anger.
    I’m also going to copy and paste the Buddha quote on fb… I Love that quote!
    Thanks for all you do.
    b

  7. 17/08/2011 11:22 am

    Terrific post, E!

    Allowing petty annoyances to infiltrate our happy place is a waste. That woman at the rest stop is her own worst enemy . . . we don’t have to hang on to anger at her actions. Doing so will only hurt us, not her.

    Loved the quotes! Especially Emerson:
    “For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

  8. 17/08/2011 2:55 pm

    Everyone is fighting their own battles inside. And while none make bad behaviors acceptable that others carry burdens they are not shouldering well can help to make their actions understandable. I try to do what Elizabeth did… just let negative things blow through me like wind through a tree and then be done with it. No, it does not always work… but the vast majority of the time it does. I enjoyed this blog,,,

  9. 17/08/2011 7:41 pm

    It is definitly easier to let go of our anger, then to let it burden our life-! I learned this valuable lesson years ago- It was not easy ! but it was well worth my effort. Hanging on to anger, destroys your chances of happiness and living your life to the fullest.

  10. 17/08/2011 8:10 pm

    Bravo for not closing the door on the inconsiderate woman! You couldn’t be responsible for her actions or her day. Only she is, and it looks as though she was completely miserable.

  11. 17/08/2011 10:07 pm

    Some people are so self absorbed they completely block out everything around them. You should give yourself a pat on the back for not getting sucked in to her negative cloud. Hopefully she will eventually learn to release her anger and not continue to spend her life being bogged down by it.

  12. 17/08/2011 10:28 pm

    To be honest, I was really hoping the story would end with you driving a few miles on and seeing that she’d been pulled over for speeding or something. She was definitely having her own private party.
    I agree, we have to choose when to get angry. Some situations are just not worth getting bent out of shape for. Anger over injustice, etc., is never misplaced.

    • 18/08/2011 10:05 pm

      I had similar thoughts. Although I also thought perhaps she had a family member in hospital or something.

  13. 18/08/2011 10:10 pm

    I’m one that rarely gets angry – despite the anger expressed on my own web site! 😆 I had good reason to be angry in that case. But under normal circumstances……. takes a lot to ruffle my feathers.

    Injustice, human rights abuses, crime and liars all make me angry.

    I think we anger more easily when we are younger. The world has less shades of grey when we are young. As we age and gain life experience, we tend to shrug our shoulders more and think “that’s life” in many cases. Yet, conversely I think we get angry over different things – like human rights abuses, for example – by the time we reach my age, we tend to be thinking “will the human race EVER learn?” and be angry that as a species we seem so darn stupid in many ways!

  14. 21/08/2011 2:47 am

    Any time we find ourselves getting furious over the actions of others,
    🙂
    did you, really?

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