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Be Yourself; Everyone Else is Already Taken!

08/11/2009

Be Yourself; Everyone Else is Already Taken!

“Wherever you are, whatever your age, you are only a thought away from changing your life.” Dr. Wayne Dyer

Do You: Meditate and Reflect on Yourself

Do You: Meditate and Reflect on Yourself

Recently, I decided to work on a series of short get-to-know-you interviews with some remarkable people I’ve met through several social networking sites; men and women who cherish their interactions with others and share their gift for communication by joining the social media conversation – each in their own unique way. My format is quite simple: I ask my interviewees the same/similar set of questions and get varied, insightful answers.

This week, I bring you another remarkable person, Deana Wilmink Martina. Deana and I connected on Twitter back in the day when sending out marathon Follow Friday kudos were ubiquitous. We soon found out, through our online conversations, that we both traveled around early in our lives, settled down in countries that weren’t our places of birth, married, manage busy households, and love uplifting quotes and brilliant photography. While I live and work in New York and she in the Netherlands, our friendship has grown despite our virtualverse/twitterverse beginnings and our distance.

Deana’s new blog, Blogging Baby Boomer, covers a range of topics on life, work, and other matters. As a self-declared baby boomer, she is always eager to learn, share ideas, enjoy sports, and a good laugh. While Deana might not play Bocce, Tennis is her sport of choice; she has solid ideas on making money from and for the baby boomer crowd and interested readers of the piece by Scott Adams of Dilbert fame. will enjoy her blog too.

“Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” Confucious

CURACAO

CURAÇAO

CURAÇAO Questions:
Tell us a bit about your background: Who are you? Where did you grow up and where do you live now?
I’m Deana Martina, 61 years old and married to Ronald Wilmink. We are parents to two sons: Patrick and Niels. The eldest (Patrick) is 21, and Niels is 19, turning 20 next month. Both are students, and they still live at home with us. I was born into a big family. My mother had 8 children. She was a twin and had two sets of twins.

I was born on Curaçao in tCuraçaobbean. I was 5 years old when my mother started to get sick, and soon she took one of my sisters and me to an orphanage, where I lived until I was 18. My mother never really got better and died when I was almost 11 years old. I must say that it wasn’t a pleasant time… I have always tried to block out that time in my life so I could turn it around without looking back.

When I was a teenager, I decided not to copy my mother’s life. I didn’t want my children to have the same experiences I had growing up. So I chose to live a completely different life from my mother’s life. I left my native Island when I was 22. I went back home soon after, then I returned to Europe again at 29 and never left. Today, the village of Wildervank in the Netherlands is home to my family and me.

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it…”
– Mahatma Gandhi

GROOT WILDERVANK

GROOT WILDERVANK

What do you do for a living?
At the moment, I am both an entrepreneur and a stay-at-home Mom. I’m building a home-based business and recently started a blog called Blogging Baby Boomer, where I share my views on life, work, books, and more. I worked for 37 years before losing my job in 1999. For a short time during my 37-year career, I worked as a Credit Controller. The rest of my time in the Corporate World, I worked in the Accounting department of a mid-sized firm. I was responsible for payroll for 21 years.

After searching for new work for quite some time, I decided to follow my own path and start my own business. I’m building a Network Marketing Business from home and using the Internet to expose aInternetd it. Building valuable network and wellness connections is an important part of the business. Before moving to this village, Wildervank, in the countryside, I lived in Groningen for 24 years and had a network I no longer have. Rebuilding/building my network will add to the excitement of being an entrepreneur.

Why did you choose the path you now follow?
Being out of a job and living on what my husband earns left our family with no room to do anything extra. All our savings were used up during the years after my job loss. I felt that I could do a lot more than wait for my retirement. Once I realized, in my opinion, that employers will not hire older employees, I chose to become an entrepreneur. I now have some new goals in my life. The transformation from an employee to an entrepreneur is very exciting because I can aim higher and reap the full rewards.

When did you decide to make key changes in your life?
I started making changes in my life at a fairly young age: leaving the Caribbean, moving to Europe, and building a new life there. I’ve been married once before, and Ronald is my second spouse. We met at a tennis tournament, where we both competed. We love the sport and continue to play mixed couples tennis at our Country Club.

“Be yourself, everyone else is already taken!” Oscar Wilde

THE NETHERLANDS

THE NETHERLANDS

Share your worldview: How do you live your life and manage your household?
Officially, I’m a stay-at-home Mom, building a home-based business. My husband has a job and brings in the family income. We live in a country where everyone is entitled to get a Scholarship to study at a University or College, as long as they qualify and get admitted. Regardless of your parents’ financial situation, every college-bound student in the Netherlands receives a scholarship.

My favorite quotes are: “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken!” by Oscar Wilde and “There is no greater beauty than the real YOU” via Nappturality. Both affect how I plan to market my new business. My view of the world is that we are in the information era, and the Internet is the perfect medium for educating and informing people about industries and products that many don’t know are available to them. The Wellness Industry is one major Industry that will grow in the coming years.

Paul Zane Pilzer defined wellness in an article he wrote for the magazine Success from Home in 2004. He wrote, “Here is how I define Wellness: Wellness is money you spend to make yourself feel healthier, even when you’re not “sick” by any standard medical terms.”

The Baby Boomer generation, those born between 1946 and 1964, is the largest around today, and Baby Boomers are living longer than in previous generations.
They want to see better, hear better, be stronger, have a strong immune system, and fight the symptoms of aging. So they will spend money in the Wellness Industry. The Wellness Industry will continue to grow, and through the Internet, people can become educated and informed about the products and services available to them.

“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.” B. Olatunji

BLOOM

BLOOM – BLOOM

Reflective Questions:
What motivates you to get out of bed?
This new life, building a people-oriented business, studying people, and building relationships with people offline and online, is so exciting to me. Seeing my grown-up sons enjoy life with their friends and learning a lot of new skills myself. Having my spouse’s support for what I do motivates me to get out of bed.
One of my life goals is to help with projects on my native Island to raise awareness for the younger generation, especially girls. I want them to become whoever they want to become and to take responsibility for their own lives. I believe education is a way out of the difficult situations women experience while living in such a masculine community. They can change their own reality without having to flee the Island, as I did.

What makes you happy/laugh?
I love comedies. Both of my sons have a good sense of humor and like to tell jokes or funny stories. So does my spouse. We have a dog, Pointer, and he is always so happy to see us, even when we’ve left him for only 30 minutes or so. Looking back, as most people do when they reach my age, I am happy with how I managed to live my life mostly on my own terms.

What makes you sad/mad?
What makes me sad is when I think, read, or hear that so little has changed for many women and children on my native Island.
There isn’t much that makes me mad. I have to admit that because I don’t have bosses to report to like I used to when I worked and lived in the Big City, I am less angry. Now we live in a peaceful, small village in the countryside.

What would you do differently with your life if you had the power? With the world if you had the choice?
If I only knew then what I know now, I would have done things differently. I would have started learning the skills to become an entrepreneur earlier in my life. I would have avoided conforming to the prevailing belief that a regular 9-to-5 job was the ideal.

If I could, I would change the world around me by changing things on my native Island. I would offer all young girls the opportunity to gain more knowledge through education and help them to become aware of the power we all have within us to become what we want to be. I will teach them to take responsibility for their own reality and be aware of the fact that male dominance can only continue if we permit it to continue.

“We don’t see things the way they are. We see things the way WE are.” Talmud

NORTHERN LIGHTS

NORTHERN LIGHTS Look for the Light Within ~ NORTHERN LIGHTS

What guiding principle(s) do you follow to make your life meaningful?
First of all, I have this mantra: Be yourself; everyone else is taken! I try to learn the Universal laws and the process of daily living; I learn what I need to function on my life path. Some other principles include blocking out negative thoughts and deciding what I permit to enter my mind; becoming aware of the law of prosperity and “letting go” of things I don’t need for important things I need to reach my goal; and permitting only the information I need to help me get the skills I need to succeed. I believe I can become the person I need to be to have the success I’m looking for.

What word(s) of advice would you give to others today?
I would advise others not to depend solely on a job but to learn the skills to become entrepreneurs. Gone are the days when we imitated the majority’s actions and expected to have a job for life; that time is over. I would advise people to rely less on Government welfare, as the rules change whenever the Government wants. Be responsible for your own income.

How would you like to be remembered?
This is a tough one. I haven’t thought about that yet… I don’t know. However, I would like my sons to remember me as a good mother and my spouse to remember me as a good spouse.

Happiness is…..?
For me, happiness is being surrounded by the people I love most, knowing they feel good. At a different time in my life, I would have thought of something else. Now I enjoy chatting with my sister on the phone and laughing with her even though we live more than 300 km apart. Seeing my kids being happy makes me happy.

Deana Wilmink Martina lives in a beautiful little village outside Groningen and recently started writing a spirited Baby Boomer Blog. You may connect with her on Twitter at this link: @DeanaMartina.
What are your reactions to this subject? Enjoy the piece and share your feedback with us. Thank You!

PHOTO CREDITS: All photos via Pixabay

 

Until Next Time…
Ask. Believe. Receive. ©
Elizabeth Obih-Frank
Mirth and Motivation
Positive Kismet

27 Comments leave one →
  1. 09/11/2009 1:41 am

    Hi Elizabeth,

    You made a great post of it!

    The big City I often refer to is Groningen.
    I understand Amsterdam is a big city and known all around the world.
    But when we say “the Big City” here in the Netherlands, we don’t always mean Amsterdam.(LOL)

    I lived in Groningen for 24 years, there is where my children were born too.

    Deana Wilmink-Martina

    • 09/11/2009 3:37 am

      You are right about Amsterdam being so popular worldwide even though The Netherlands has many wonderful and beautiful cities to visit. 😉
      What also impresses me is that all students get a scholarship to study at the university level. It is one major financial concern that keeps many parents up at night in other countries…
      Thank you!

  2. 09/11/2009 8:57 am

    Elizabeth, All this – the scholarship and also the financial support for parents with children from 0 to 18 years – is all possible because people pay a high percentage of taxes here in the Netherlands.

    I will send you a link to read the experiences of an American working in the Netherlands. He had put down his impressions about these social laws here in the Netherlands and the percentages of taxes and premiums paid.

    Very Interesting.
    Deana

    • 09/11/2009 3:37 pm

      Yes, I am aware of the very high taxes that underscore the terrific services and financial support people enjoy in your part of the world… Many other friends in Europe are used to it and appreciate the benefits; something that I believe will be difficult to digest in some other parts of our world but is truly necessary.
      Please email the link as I’d love to read his observations. TY!

  3. Goz permalink
    11/11/2009 4:04 am

    Interesting.. More please:)

    • 13/11/2009 1:49 pm

      Glad to read that you enjoyed it… More coming soon and thank you for the support! 😉
      Eliz

  4. Mosinski permalink
    19/05/2010 10:44 am

    Treasured information and superb design and style you received on this post! I want to thank you for sharing your thinking and time in the ideas you submitted!!! Thumbs up!

    • 27/05/2010 2:21 pm

      Thanks for your feedback … much appreciated! 🙂

  5. Ebony permalink
    25/06/2026 1:49 am

    This was such an uplifting reminder. Authenticity is one of the greatest gifts we can offer the world, and life becomes much more fulfilling when we embrace who we truly are. Thank you for sharing!

    • Eliz@MirthandMotivation permalink*
      25/06/2026 1:53 am

      Indeed it is and can be a fulfilling way to live our lives even in the days of social media.

  6. Carol Cassara permalink
    06/08/2026 1:15 am

    This is one of my favorite quotes. It’s so important to not put on airs or pretend to be someone you are not. This quote sums it all up nicely.

    • Eliz@MirthandMotivation permalink*
      07/08/2026 3:22 pm

      I concur. We could all learn from this one.

  7. gentlebim permalink
    06/08/2026 4:46 am

    I really love this one! It’s so easy for us to think we need to imitate others to be a better version of ourselves. We don’t!

    • Eliz@MirthandMotivation permalink*
      07/08/2026 3:24 pm

      Exactly. That is why I never understood celebrity worship and imitation. Just do you!

  8. Amber permalink
    06/08/2026 11:04 am

    This is the best message. I always told my kids the same and I am so glad they embrace who they are. It’s the best way to be!

    • Eliz@MirthandMotivation permalink*
      07/08/2026 3:33 pm

      Totally, and that is why I love your blog. You are living it for real.

  9. Richard Lowe permalink
    07/08/2026 4:22 pm

    An entrepeneur and a stay at home mom. Thats more than a handful. Lots work work and maintaining a blog. impressive.

    • Eliz@MirthandMotivation permalink*
      09/08/2026 4:54 am

      She was an employee and worked as an accountant before the children. She was a great mom, hardworking woman and a dear friend. May she Rest in Peace.💔🙏🏾🕊

  10. Karletta permalink
    08/08/2026 2:07 am

    I love this format. There’s so much we can learn from others. When I think of what Deana experienced as a young girl, losing her mum like that, you can see she’s gathered a lot of wisdom over the years. I’d be very interested in reading more of these in the interview series. This question is gold: What would you do differently with your life if you had the power? With the world if you had the choice?

    • Eliz@MirthandMotivation permalink*
      09/08/2026 4:55 am

      Thank you and each person I interviewed gave me a different answer. I kept the questions the same intentionally because we all respond to life situations differently even if it looks the same.

  11. Bedabrata Chakraborty permalink
    08/08/2026 6:27 am

    Indeed we do not have to copy others. Being comfortable with who we are can take time.

    • Eliz@MirthandMotivation permalink*
      09/08/2026 4:52 am

      Absolutely. That is why I don’t understand people who want everyone to be the same… they often mean “be like me.” Do you!

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