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Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact

21/03/2013

“Making eye contact with adults while dressed as a clown is risky.” Doug Coupland

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact - Dress like a clown

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact – Dress like a clown

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact - Want a Cat's love

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact – Want a Cat’s love

someecards.com - I hope you understand that staring at you makes me anxious, mad and sad. I shoot the arrows and you get the girl.
When You’re feeling anxious, mad or sad.

How/When to Avoid Making Eye Contact: ♥When dressed as a clown – wear dark glasses or look down. Some people are deathly scared of clowns.
♥Apparently, Cats don’t like being looked at – Sneer instead or wink at them. Let them do the staring and save you the hassle. My cat has it down.
♥If you’re feeling anxious, mad or sad – stay away from the source of pain

It’s common knowledge that eye contact is an important part of communication. We make eye contact to establish trust, familiarity, confidence and even friendship with others. Some use eye contact to intimidate or stare down an opponent. For a shy person, making eye contact can be a challenge because it’s uncomfortable for some of us to look directly into the eyes of other people; especially the eyes of strangers. With some effort, we can learn to look without feeling terrified.

“If you go flying back through time, and you see somebody else flying forward into the future, it’s probably best to avoid eye contact” Jack Handy

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact - Wear Google glass

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact – Wear Google glass

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact - Public stalls and urinals

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact – Public stalls and urinals

someecards.com - Listen, I had a dream and a guy on something called a TV was saying, Google me, tweet me, facebook me. Maybe I'm drunk.

How/When to Avoid Making Eye Contact: ♥While wearing Google Glass… Just say “okay glass,” and it takes care of everything – no eye contact needed. ♥When Sitting in a stall or using a urinal at a public bathroom, it is definitely not a time to stare – feel free to close your eyes.
♥Watching your favorite TV character in a drunken moment demands averted eyes – feel his pain with eyes cast asunder.

When I researched the topic online, there were lots of articles on how to make  effective eye contact, articles on cultures that don’t encourage direct eye contact out of respect, and on the benefits of looking directly at others when we speak. For this post on “How To do something,” I decided to take the path of humor which is always a great way to break the ice. Some of the suggestions are true and others are tongue in cheek.

“I’m hopeless at small talk and have a problem making eye contact.” Gary Numan

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact - Be Pinocchio and tell a lie

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact – Be Pinocchio and tell a lie

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact - Eat a banana

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact – Eat a banana

someecards.com - When I'm feeling inferior, I go for a drive. My car makes all the eye contacts I usually avoid.
When you’re feeling inferior/insecure

How/When to Avoid Making Eye Contact: ♥When telling a lie, the eyes will give you away unless you’re a seasoned pathological liar – best to avert the gaze of another when fibbing.
♥When eating a banana or a lollipop, keep your eyes to yourself – don’t ask me why, do the math.
♥If you’re feeling insecure or down on yourself, avoid eye contact especially with manipulative types – they know the look and feed off it. Take a De-stress ride.

I found it quite interesting reading some of the articles on making eye contact. There is an impressive body of work with great insights on the subject. A Google search gave me about 539,000,000 results and I’ve added some links in the post. More below!

“If there’s anybody that you suspect, you can just say ‘Hi, can I help you?’ and keep their eye contact a little bit longer and smile in a creepy way.” Kevin Ryan

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact - Feel superior and look proud

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact – Feel superior and look proud

someecards.com - Hey you juju face, what you staring at? Do I look like a creep to you?
When there is a disconnect between past, present and future time.

How/When to Avoid Making Eye Contact: ♥If you’re feeling full of yourself and are tempted to look at others with disdain, don’t – Take a chill pill and regroup.
♥If you’re having a narcissistic moment and have the urge to talk to yourself in a mirror, don’t – Resist the urge and go read a book or turn on the telly.

It’s interesting that despite the reports that show the power of eye contact in professional settings, I’ve heard/read that some bosses, and those who see themselves as superior to their staff or subordinates might feel justified in not looking at their staff or look down at them. I haven’t had such experience with bosses so it might be an anomaly.

“Certainly, being aware of what your own body language is — not showing intimidation, making eye contact, leaning forward — shows that you’re interested and want to say something.” Richard Frankel

someecards.com - You don't need to make jokes, you are the joke.
When you feel secure enough to call someone a joke to their face.

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact - Time travel

Humor: How & When To Avoid Making Eye Contact – Time travel

How/When to Avoid Making Eye Contact: ♥If you’re feeling confident with a touch of snarky,  and are ready to bust some chops, stop. Ramp the meanness down and remember the golden rule. Smile, shake hands and crush hug the person.
♥If you’ve had some time to travel and feel worldly, avoid eye contact at all costs when those two uninformed  %&%#*&!!  ask you if you enjoyed your time in the bush with Tigers in the capital of Africa. – Smile, look away, and wistfully inform them that Africa is a continent and the city you visited had a zoo.

Naturally, if you visit any of the cultures that consider it taboo to look others directly in eye, don’t worry about making eye contact … nobody is looking.  When do you look away?

Happy March! This post was inspired by a prompt from Problogger.net’s Darren Rowse: Group Writing Project: Write A How To Post
1. Write a ‘how to’ post
2. Let us Know about your post
3. Surf Surf Surf
4. Link, Tweet, Share
5. Prizes
Yep, I told you so. I see dead people and
they all look like me
Once you’ve posted your How To post let us know about it by leaving a comment below. Please make sure you include your name, your post title and the URL to your How to post. Comments must be received by midnight on Friday 22nd March to be included in the prize draw.

Positive Motivation Tip: Humor in all things can help ease our fears about connecting with others… Relax!

PHOTO CREDITS/ATTRIBUTIONS: All Photos: Clown, Pinocchio, Bananas, Google glass, Kitty, Parent pride, wooden time, public toilets, Pride,via Wikipedia All my Someecards designed by Moi at someecards.com

Until Next Time…
Ask. Believe. Receive. ©
Elizabeth Obih-Frank
Mirth and Motivation
Positive Kismet

56 Comments leave one →
  1. 22/03/2013 5:54 pm

    Banana. Lollipop. Hilarious!

    • 06/04/2013 5:16 am

      I knew you’d cotton on to that one Genevieve! I’m still trying to figure it out. 😆

  2. 22/03/2013 8:05 pm

    haha – fantastic!

  3. 22/03/2013 8:07 pm

    Funny but as a kid, I almost never made eye contact, as I was way too shy. Now I like looking into people’s eyes while talking with them. It makes me feel more connected.

    • 06/04/2013 5:31 am

      Great Miriam! I was a shy child too so I can relate. I also come from a culture where direct eye contact is not always seen the way it’s interpreted in the West. 🙂

  4. 22/03/2013 9:11 pm

    Great fun, and some good advice!

    • 06/04/2013 6:28 am

      TY Kathleen! Did you participate in this one? 🙂

  5. 22/03/2013 10:35 pm

    I’ll keep them all in mind and heart. I may need one of these tips one day. Fun post!

  6. ropcorn permalink
    23/03/2013 5:08 am

    I find it fascinating that eye contact can mean so many different things in different cultures and among different species. A very interesting post, Eliz. Thank you for sharing. 🙂

    • 06/04/2013 6:42 am

      Isn’t it fascinating? And we can say so much with our eyes too. TY! 😉

  7. 23/03/2013 9:00 am

    It’s funny but I can spot a con, by watching the eyes, quite often. We were watching Shark Tank the other night and I told my husband this guy was full of it. He must have been blinking 50x a minute! dead giveaway of a liar.
    Fun post!
    b

    • 06/04/2013 6:58 am

      You are funny! I should watch that movie… I’ve heard about it three times now. 🙂

      • 13/04/2013 10:21 am

        It’s a TV show on Friday nights. There are real people pitching business ideas to rich moguls hoping to get their backing. Fascinates me!

      • 24/05/2013 12:37 am

        Aye! 🙂

  8. 23/03/2013 2:03 pm

    Hilarious! I love that Jack Handy quote 😀

    • 06/04/2013 7:01 am

      Isn’t it just crazy funny!? i love it too. 😉

  9. itsmeenakshi77 permalink
    24/03/2013 5:57 am

    Hilarious post, enjoyed it immensely. Particularly liked those user cards. Now I agree, making eye contact every time is not a wise idea.

    • 06/04/2013 7:03 am

      I’m with you on that; especially while using public transportation… Hmm I should have added that one to my list. On the NY Subway, sometimes creepy people get on and try to have a staring competition. I always carry reading materials. 😆

  10. 24/03/2013 1:46 pm

    Excellent written… 🙂

    The quote of Jack Handy is really great – when you first read it so it is tremendously fun – but then when you think about it, it’s much more than that… 🙂 😉

    • 06/04/2013 7:04 am

      TY! good ol’ Jack is at it again. I thought it was nutty funny when I read it… I’m still laughing. 😆

  11. 25/03/2013 4:53 am

    Love this post, Elizabeth. It certainly gave me a few giggles. 😀

    • 06/04/2013 8:27 am

      TY Adin! I had a lot of fun doing it and Darren has a few more up his sleeve… All are welcome to participate. 🙂

  12. 25/03/2013 10:06 pm

    Thanks for the laugh, Elizabeth. I was chuckling as i read.

  13. 26/03/2013 2:22 pm

    Clowns = scary! *shudder* Very true, however, with bananas and lollipops! (Nor should you really eat a lollipop in public if you’re over the age of 10…)
    😉

  14. 26/03/2013 6:15 pm

    Bwuahaaahaaaa. I needed a little comic relief today. 🙂

  15. 27/03/2013 3:05 am

    He he he….thanks for the laughs Eliz 😀

  16. 27/03/2013 8:06 pm

    I believe you have covered it all. A great dose of humor.:)

    • 06/04/2013 9:16 am

      TY! I had to make some changes as I noticed I had dropped a few words. Thanks Lynne! 🙂

  17. 28/03/2013 11:15 am

    A hilarious post on avoiding eye contact. Great humour!

    • 06/04/2013 10:45 am

      TY Munchow. I’m glad you enjoyed it. 🙂

  18. 28/03/2013 9:27 pm

    Very good! 😀

    Popping by to say Happy Easter! I see you are as hectic as we are. But I do think of you!!

    • 06/04/2013 11:00 am

      Oh Robin TY! Happy Easter to You and yours too! 🙂

  19. 03/04/2013 4:01 pm

    Thanks! for a great and inspiring blogpost! The eyes are the mirror of the soul. (Looking forward to connecting at Authority ROI)… Best Wishes Always*

    • 06/04/2013 11:37 am

      TY Thomas and I’m glad we connected too… You are a gifted artist and I look forwrad to enjoying your work. 🙂

  20. Thomas Di Leva permalink
    03/04/2013 4:03 pm

    Thanks for a great and inspiring post! The eyes are the mirror of the soul. (Looking forward to connecting on Authority ROI)… Best Wishes Always*

  21. 11/04/2013 8:55 am

    Ah yes, humor. So important in writing and communicating. What we can’t say seriously is often well-communicated with humor. I just wish I was good at it!

    • 12/04/2013 9:27 am

      For someone who has the the word Mirth in her blog name, I sometimes wonder what I was thinking when I chose it. I can be funny with friends but writing humor is a whole other ballgame. Oh well, we live and learn. 😉

  22. 12/04/2013 9:18 am

    I love to make eye contact with people. Unless they are averting their eyes from me I love to stare deep into the color pools of their eyes. I find peoples eye are the most beautiful part of the body. Weird? yep but that is me. Now, I never make eye contact with a dog until it is okay with being touched.

    • 23/05/2013 11:05 pm

      I’m glad you shared this because I do wonder about people, especially strangers, who stare deep into your eyes. 😆 I applaud your boldness though. As for the dog, I’d leave him alone and look the other way too. 🙂

  23. 06/11/2013 1:46 am

    Cats don’t like being looked at – Sneer instead or wink at them…

  24. 06/11/2013 1:50 am

    True… funny video. TY! 😆

  25. 13/12/2013 5:01 pm

    I used to had a poor eye contact when I was younger. But after I graduated in college and land a job, my personality had developed and my self esteem boost. So that I can confidently make eye to eye contact now. Well, there are few people I don’t want to had eye contact with. I love to make eye contact with my son though. I love his eyes, that’s why 🙂

  26. Lyosha Varezhkina (@lyoshathegirl) permalink
    21/10/2018 12:48 am

    It is so funny! I know it is supposed to be so but I am impressed! So nice!

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