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Musings: Ten Tips For A Saner Life…

01/08/2012

“He was saner than anyone — he had fallen out of the world of illusion: love, interesting work, hope for the future.” John Gardner

Musings: Ten Tips For A Saner Life… Keep wheel of emotional ups/downs in check. Robert Plutchik’s Wheel of Emotions (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Auguries of Innocence by William Blake (1757–1827)via bartleby.com
TO see a world in a grain of sand,
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour.

I can’t believe we are already in the month of August, and on the homestretch to saying adieu to summer and hello to fall. This summer seems to have whizzed by and I’m not quite sure why. I’ve done my share of running around, and had my bouts of health related issues (Don’t you love those long-winded phrases? Yeah, sounds better than saying I’ve just been ill. 😆 ). Anyhow, recently, I read a terrific O Magazine article by Brené Brown that got me thinking about the idea of living life saner and authentically. She gave four tips/life lessons that resonated with me deeply, and I’ve added other tips to take us from here into the fall and beyond. I’ll include hers in this piece and give credit. All of our actions are tied to our emotions, and when we are pulled in many directions, we end up on an emotional roller coaster/merry go round. The following tips will help remind us to temper those swings and stay sane and calm. What would you recommend? Below are ten to mull over:
♥Self-Acceptance Is The Foundation to a Saner Life – Wherever you are, whatever you do, your sanity, happiness and sense of self begins with accepting you as you.
♥Fitting In Is Not Belonging – As Brené suggests in her piece, “Belonging starts with self-acceptance … Believing that you’re enough is what gives you the courage to be authentic.” (credit)
♥Constantly Comparing Self to Others Leads to Misery – Until we walk in another person’s shoes we don’t know their struggles, so stop the hand-wringing.
♥Perfectionism Is Not About Striving for Excellence – Instead of focusing on “How can I improve?” Perfectionism makes us re-frame our focus from excellence to subservience with the question: “What will they think?” (credit)

“The creative person is both more primitive and more cultivated, more destructive, a lot madder and a lot saner, than the average person.” Frank Barron

Musings: Ten Tips For A Saner Life… You Belong Here and Everywhere (Photo credit: Joe Shlabotnik)

A robin redbreast in a cage 5
Puts all heaven in a rage.
A dove-house fill’d with doves and pigeons
Shudders hell thro’ all its regions.
A dog starv’d at his master’s gate Predicts the ruin of the state. 10
A horse misused upon the road
Calls to heaven for human blood.

♥ There Is Nothing To Prove, We Are Enough – Once you believe in yourself and believe you belong; here, there, anywhere, there is no need to convince others. Just be.
♥Vulnerability Is an Act of Courage – Pretending we never feel vulnerable is counterproductive to growth. Relax! “When you know what you’re feeling and why, you can slow down, breathe, pray, ask for support…” Brené Brown  (credit)
♥Envy Is A Waste Of Time – Envying another and feeding the green eyed monster of jealousy will diminish us and our skills.
♥ Self-Care means Nurturing All of Our Being – Exercise the body, mind and spirit and feed it uplifting messages.
With age comes a recognition that all those all night parties, both-end-candle burning and stress inducing moments have to be exchanged for healthier options or our health will give us hell to pay. Anytime we act in moderation, we add to prolonging and preserving our life. I’ve been taking classes, learning more about photography and, as a way to build a portfolio and work at getting better at the craft, I decided to enter a fun contest. I am a novice but I’m enjoying the process. Please check out my submission and support me through the “collect me” feature which is similar to a Like button. Click “Collect Me” to help my entry in the One Life Photography Competition via eliz obih-frank.  Hey, submit your photos too. Thank you! 🙂 More below!

“To wish you were someone else is to waste the person you are.” Frank Barron

Musings: Ten Tips For A Saner Life… Enjoy your life! (Photo credit: MadlyInLoveWithLife)

Each outcry of the hunted hare
A fibre from the brain does tear.
A skylark wounded in the wing, 15
A cherubim does cease to sing.
The game-cock clipt and arm’d for fight
Does the rising sun affright.

♥Guilt Isn’t Bad For You – Feeling pangs of guilt (not shame)  keep us grounded, empathetic and compassionate. It is what makes us accept our mistake and  apologize for hurting someone’s feelings. “If you’re experiencing guilt, the answer is yes: “I made a mistake.” Shame, on the other hand, is “I’m sorry. I am a mistake.” Brené Brown (credit)
♥Make Friends with Gratitude and Charity – When we feel truly content, grateful for our lot, we are not afraid to help others or share our abundance. Practice both.
♥The Future Is Now… Live – Take time now to smell those roses, plant those seeds and choose a saner lifestyle. Tempus Fugit. *bonus #11
Remember that to err is human and to forgive is divine. Find your flow/rhythm and follow it through. Don’t forget friends and family and other creative outlets for nurturing the spirit and always enjoy the moment. What are your thoughts? What makes your world saner? Have you fully accepted who you are? Are you living a saner life now? How have you handled your struggles? Do you love who you are as you are? What sacrifices for the sake of sanity have you made? What would you recommend? Do share! Thank you. 😉

*Please bear with me as I catch up on your blogs and commenting… I’m back on track with reading and responding to your blogs; albeit slowly. Thank you all for your patience! 🙂

For More: Women’s Lives & Issues 

Positive Motivation Tip: Wherever you are, and whatever you do, your sanity and  happiness depend on you being you…

PHOTO CREDITS/ATTRIBUTIONS: All Photos:  Plutnik’s Wheel of Emotion via WikipediaYou Belong Here by Joe Shlabotnik, City Lights by madlyinlovewithlife via Flickr

Until Next Time…
Ask. Believe. Receive. ©
Elizabeth Obih-Frank
Mirth and Motivation
Positive Kismet

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41 Comments leave one →
  1. 02/08/2012 8:29 am

    Her photos are amazing. Good luck with your entry. Love that Frank Barron quote.

    • 02/08/2012 8:32 am

      TY for checking them out! I’m a novice and did it as a way to learn and connect and grow… Merci! 🙂
      I love Barron’s quotes too. I can’t fathom why he doesn’t have a Wikipedia page….

      • 02/08/2012 10:14 am

        He actually does.

      • 02/08/2012 6:13 pm

        TY Adin but that’s not him… I saw this one when I checked Wikipedia and it is for a sports figure with same name. Barron was a professor and psychologist. I added links from his bio on the Esalen Institute site. Thanks for helping anyway! 🙂

  2. Katherine Gordy Levine permalink
    02/08/2012 8:43 am

    Reblogged this on Emotfit’s Blog and commented:
    THINKING ABOUT WHAT MATTERS. As always Elizabeth gives us much to think about as well as thoughtful quotes and pictures to illustrate.

    • eof737 permalink*
      02/08/2012 8:57 am

      Thank you for the re-blog! 🙂

  3. 02/08/2012 11:03 am

    Love Brene Brown! Her TED talk on vulnerability was amazing. You’ve added some valuable advice here. Nice job!
    b

    • 02/08/2012 6:15 pm

      TY Barb! I love her insights too. Brilliant. 😉

  4. 02/08/2012 11:39 am

    I sometimes have to read your blog twice…You give us a lot to consider and grasp…All good I say…but, I have to think about what I really feel…I do accept myself…”good, bad, ugly” as they say…I actually like me…Not perfection…but, workable…and worthwhile…Authenticity is what I look for in others…so don’t they deserve that from me…What You see is what you get pretty much…but, I try to make it worthwhile…~mkg

    • 02/08/2012 6:16 pm

      I believe you… I hadn’t planned this one but the article triggered the post and I’m glad it did. TY! 🙂

  5. 02/08/2012 2:12 pm

    Wow, this is timely for me.
    Just when I was beginning to think, ‘yes, I accept myself. I’m enough and there’s nothing to prove’, criticism from others push me back into severe doubt. I think part of living a saner life is surrounding yourself with people who love themselves and have nothing to prove. A man with something to prove will probably walk all over you to “prove” a (pointless) point.

    Awesome post. Thank you.

    • 02/08/2012 6:18 pm

      Aye! Thank you Kemi and I love your feedback too. Good people around us is important and paying attention to what we say and how, matter too. TY!

  6. 02/08/2012 6:09 pm

    Love the list, Eliz! Maybe we could take one each month and concentrate on fulfilling it in our lives if we aren’t already. 🙂

    • 02/08/2012 6:19 pm

      Great idea! Or we can stay open to learning how we handle difficult events.. TY! 😉

  7. 02/08/2012 6:12 pm

    Great list – I have a lot of work to do – ha!

    • 02/08/2012 6:20 pm

      Oh… same here, and I wish it would all get done already. TY! 😉

  8. 02/08/2012 7:49 pm

    I think blogging helps keep ones sanity in place…brings the focus on sharing and that is always a good thing. You are amazing. I know I already said it but I cannot help it! 🙂 Wishing you luck with your photography contest…

    • 02/08/2012 10:09 pm

      Thanks for your kind words Sunshine. You are amazing too and honestly, I think we are all amazing in our own way! It’s all good. 😉

  9. 03/08/2012 12:57 am

    Wherever you are, and whatever you do –
    do you know the song which starts with these lyrics?

    • 03/08/2012 1:10 am

      No I don’t but I see you sent a link. I will check it out TY!. 🙂

  10. 03/08/2012 1:02 am

    Richard Marx?

  11. 03/08/2012 6:06 am

    Great list. Some of these also remind me of the lessons in the book “The Happiness Project” Thanks for reminding me to slow down.

    • 03/08/2012 6:33 am

      TY for taking a moment to give me feedback. 🙂

  12. 03/08/2012 6:39 am

    Great Post! I Love your photos :+) I tried to comment and like but I’m not sure it worked. I’ll have to go back and check. Stunning Photos!

    • 03/08/2012 6:47 am

      TY Starlaschat! I appreciate the effort but if not feasible… it’s okay. I realize some blogging folk are uncomfortable with being asked for help or a favor… It’s not by force… So, I really appreciate you helping me. 😉
      Thanks again!
      E

      • 03/08/2012 7:05 am

        I’m usually happy to help. I’m just a little slow learing how to leave comments on different sight other than wordpress. I have beautiful images of your flower dancing in my head this morning as I cook breakfast. Thank You for your lovely and unbeat post this morning. :+)

      • 03/08/2012 7:15 am

        TY so much Star… It’s this sort of generosity that makes me stop and catch my breath with gratitude. Blessings for a great weekend! 🙂

      • 03/08/2012 7:26 am

        YW Blessing to you too for a great weekend as well! :+)

      • 03/08/2012 7:28 am

        🙂

  13. 03/08/2012 12:05 pm

    Reblogged this on Bedside Reader and commented:
    ELiz, I’d like to add to the saner life list with this thought: Learn to accept gifts, material and otherwise, from others. In this way, we can give more of ourselves to others.

    • 04/08/2012 1:29 am

      Thank you for the re-blog and I like your addition to the list… Giving and receiving are twins; they need each other to complete the dynamic cycle of reciprocity. Sadly, some don’t understand that when we give, we are doubly blessed. TY! 🙂

  14. 04/08/2012 1:52 am

    Excellent tips. I’m pleased to see that I already do some of them, though there’s still some work needed 🙂

  15. 04/08/2012 7:33 am

    We were having a similar discussion a few nights ago — my sister and I. Will have to share these tips with her. Thanks for posting, Elizabeth.

  16. 04/08/2012 8:09 am

    A great post with inspiring tips! Ahh if only people would listen while I keep on telling them that NOW is what we should live for. 😛

  17. 05/08/2012 8:25 am

    I think I’ll be a happy bug today and hang out at the tips of the yellow and green petals 🙂

  18. Change Coach Pam permalink
    06/08/2012 11:23 am

    Reblogged this on Get to Your Happy Place! and commented:
    Read Elizabeth’s ‘Ten Great Tips for a Saner Life’ for a healthy dose of calm on a Monday!

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